I went to Afghanistan to get a hip hop nickname

You know, I wish I could give myself a hip hop nickname. Layne calls herself L-Boogie, which is . . . awesome. But I don’t have a hip hop nickname, and I think if anyone needs one, it’s me, right?

Since I’ve arrived in Kabul, I’ve been doing a ton of work on process improvement and I’ve written some code, but most of what I’ve done has been in MS Access and SQL.

So here it is:


That’s right – I’ve blended my innate nerdiness with my huge resevoir of street cred to come up the nickname that will someday become my only name. I’m pretty excited about it. dBase is happy – and you don’t want to see dBase angry. There’s another big benefit: I can easily talk about myself in the third person.

Plus, it can be taken so many different ways. The tech nerds will hear what they want to hear and the people with large stereos will think that “dBase” is spelled “de bass,” meaning that I can really pump out “de bass” when I really want to. It will be sort of sad when those large-stereo folks come to realize their mistake, but still, up until that point it will be awesome.

So try out these phrases in the next few days and see how they feel:

“What’s up dBase?”

“dBase! What’s happening?”

“dBase, why you gots to go and be like that?”

“You know who is really good at table tennis? That dBase!”
Stuff like that.

dBase out.

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2 Responses to I went to Afghanistan to get a hip hop nickname

  1. Bob says:

    I don’t know, it could lead you to believe people are talking about you when they are not (read: paranoia), for example: Hey how are things going the d base? or The runner stole d base and is heading for another. Worse yet, it is awfully close to ‘debase,’ which means the act of making someone lower in value, quality, character or dignity. Are you sure?

  2. nicole stern says:

    kinda diggin’ it