I went to Afghanistan to get a hip hop nickname

You know, I wish I could give myself a hip hop nickname. Layne calls herself L-Boogie, which is . . . awesome. But I don’t have a hip hop nickname, and I think if anyone needs one, it’s me, right?

Since I’ve arrived in Kabul, I’ve been doing a ton of work on process improvement and I’ve written some code, but most of what I’ve done has been in MS Access and SQL.

So here it is:

dBase

That’s right – I’ve blended my innate nerdiness with my huge resevoir of street cred to come up the nickname that will someday become my only name. I’m pretty excited about it. dBase is happy – and you don’t want to see dBase angry. There’s another big benefit: I can easily talk about myself in the third person.

Plus, it can be taken so many different ways. The tech nerds will hear what they want to hear and the people with large stereos will think that “dBase” is spelled “de bass,” meaning that I can really pump out “de bass” when I really want to. It will be sort of sad when those large-stereo folks come to realize their mistake, but still, up until that point it will be awesome.

So try out these phrases in the next few days and see how they feel:

“What’s up dBase?”

“dBase! What’s happening?”

“dBase, why you gots to go and be like that?”

“You know who is really good at table tennis? That dBase!”
Stuff like that.

dBase out.

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Kabul in Winter – not the book you web searchers

So there is a book by the title Kabul in Winter, and while the winter is many months away, I have been thinking about it for some reason. Each day when I leave my barracks, whether there is cloud cover or not, there is a haze over the city, and sometimes, during the late summer, the dust blown by the wind is so thick that visibility is less than a mile.

But this sort of air quality is super clean compared to Kabul in the winter. As I’ve noted in earlier posts, only about 15% of Afghani homes have electricity, and while this statistic is slightly higher in the city, there are still millions of Kabul’s citizens that do not have a reliable electric supply. And I’m not so concerned about the lack of TV, radio or other appliances (however, without a refrigerator, life is difficult, right?) I’m more concerned about the lack of heat in the winter. It’s a common story from the people on the camp that have been through a winter here to talk about how the locals in Kabul will burn anything to stay warm. The sky turns black with the smoke from tires, pvc, plastic and any other material that will oxidize.

Kabul in the winter is known as the city with the worst air quality in the world.

I like to try and think of solutions to problems like this. I’m not alone. I’ve got good friends that feel very challenged by social issues like this, and I hope that everyone who hears about this problem would take just a minute to think creatively about how to solve it. I’m not so concerned with the air quality as much as the problem that drives the air quality issues – heat.

There’s a book that came out a decade ago called “Cold House.” The author had grown up in the US, but in a place where there was no electric heat. I spent some of my elementary school years in northern Wisconsin in a house that was heated by a wood stove, so I know some of the stories in this book. My dad or mom was up before dawn to get the fire going and to turn on the fan that would heat the house. My brothers and I would stand on the vents in our pajamas and wait for the fire to get hot enough to warm us up. That kind of story might be very foreign to all but a few in the United States. Unless you’ve had an extreme outdoor experience and have been very cold for a very long time, it’s hard to wrap the mind around the battle that it can be to stay warm. It’s something I think about whenever I see the homeless in Boise during the winter. I always wonder where they go to stay warm.

Yesterday, I was thinking that same question about 70% of the population of Kabul – a few million people.

The answer is that they burn stuff – anything they can. There are no forests in this area, so wood is scarce. In the battle to stay warm, they sacrifice the sky and for many, their own lives because the smoke from the plastic and rubber items they burn gets into their lungs and they die much earlier than they should.

So how would you help the people of Kabul to heat their homes for the 3-4 months of winter that is cold enough to kill?

Here’s what I came up with:

Build a pipeline with a spur to Kabul. This is actually planned, to get oil from Turkmenistan to India – but it wouldn’t have a stop in Kabul – it would go through Kandahar. I’d propose that oil be used as a base for heating oil that could be distributed in the city and burned by portable heaters.

Burn other minerals. I don’t know if there is coal in the mountains here in Kabul, but if there was, I’d propose mining it and transporting it to the residents who would need stoves that could stand the high heat.

Pellet stoves. I think that this may be my best idea. While I started thinking of other compressed wood products like logs, pellets would be easier to transport and carry by the people. The stoves that burn these pellets could be mass-produced in Kabul. I think the source for the pellets should be Russia, but I think that the Afghans should also plant tree farms like those in southern Oregon to provide wood for fuel.

Propane. Whether brought in by truck or another pipeline project – propane or butane or some other compressed gas, could be distributed in portable tanks like those you get for your BBQ. The heaters that use these canisters are cheap and easy to use. The fact that these canisters can be used as explosives puts the kibosh on this plan, but I think it’s still a good idea.

Wind power to make electricity for heat. The pictures I’ve taken show the multiple hillsides and valleys that surround this city. Wind turbines could be well-used here. On nearly every day that I’ve been here, there has been enough of a wind to keep those things running.

I don’t know, what do you think?

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

bin Laden has left the building

Wow, I didn’t expect to wake up to this news – did anyone?

I have had a lot of moments lately where my brain has seemed to shut down in order to try and deal with the rapid change going on around me, and this morning felt like that. I was in a daze that actually reminded me of that morning in 2001 when we sat watching television and tried to come to terms with the tragedy.

I really really wish that we had been able to capture this man. Dying in a firefight is, in my opinion, not the best way for this man to die. His followers can now see him go out in a blaze of glory, instead of standing trial and standing humiliated in front of the world before hanging by the neck. There is no doubt in my mind about the values of mercy, grace and forgiveness, but this man turned his back on the human race with the acts he perpetrated. He crossed the line 20 years ago where it would have been humanly impossible for anyone to extend these things to him, and God may have struggled with it as well, who knows. Punishment for his crimes against our people and the people of the world needed to be long, and I wanted him to feel it, intensely. I don’t think there is a prison or detention facility that would measure up to the standard that I imagined for this guy.

And I hate to admit it, but I would have petitioned the federal government to build a place of pain specifically for this man.

More on the thirst for revenge later.

My Afghani co-workers here are happy about the news. They know that there could be unrest in the city because of it, but for the most part, they seem to think that things will be quiet – mainly because security forces would punish any demonstrators. Several of the workers were appalled at the innocent lives take in 2001 and were glad to see the perpetrator brought down. One of the Filipino kitchen workers couldn’t understand my question when I asked him what he thought about the news. That was a common response. I had to be patient to get anything out of people here. When I asked what they thought when they heard the news, they misunderstand and tell me the whole story without editorializing. After I ask them again, they seemed to understand and several have stated that it is the first good news of 2011 (or 1390, if you are on the Afghan calendar.)

The Taliban and Osama didn’t really get along too well. They had sheltered him, but according to the workers here, Al Qaeda and the Taliban fought each other as much as they collaborated. My co-workers do not think this development will change the Taliban and the “Spring Offensive” in any way.

“Spring Offensive.” It’s such an oxymoron in my view. Yes, it is offensive, but it’s like saying, “Hey, for New Year’s this year, let’s not celebrate an enjoy each other’s company as much as shoot some people.”

READ BELOW THIS FOR A HEAPING HELPING OF ADAM’S OPINION. DISCLAIMER – IF YOU DON’T LIKE MY OPINION, DEAL WITH IT.

In any case something has been going through my mind and I’ve written privately about it, and in as much as I can speak to it, I’m going to. I was reading a review of a book, and the author used an example to describe wickedness in the human heart. He used the words of scripture, of Jesus himself, to remind us that if we have thought about doing things in our minds/hearts, then we are as guilty as if we’d done the acts themselves. Basically, having murderous thoughts makes you a murderer. Jesus said so.

I want justice, which in most cases is going to mean death for Osama. Sure, I can ask for forgiveness from God, but I’m not very excited about a life where I take exception to my religious beliefs when it’s convenient, knowing I can just make up with God later.

The reviewer went on to use an example of a bully who punches a smaller child. The bully has done wrong – that is obvious – but this author indicated that if the victim wishes the bully was dead, it was also the victim who’s done wrong. This, he theorized, is the nature of humanity’s deeply ingrained wickedness.

So when I hunger and thirst for revenge instead of righteousness, I’m condemned right? Even if I want justice, and I know that the justice of the state will mean death, what side of God am I coming down on? There are surely 1000 opinions about this issue, and I’m sure that there are Christians reading this that believe they know the opinion that is true, but let me tell you mine. Stop reading if you don’t care or if you’ll feel compelled to write me an essay in response – I’m not interested – write your own blog.

When Jesus laid down the law about “sinning in your heart,” an audience analysis is very important. The people he was trying to convict were the people who had been thinking that they were perfect. Much like today, there were people that thought that since they didn’t murder people, they weren’t so bad. In fact, they were better than everyone else because of their observance of the law. Jesus calls them to task and lets them know that their thoughts and emotions are as powerful as their actions. You know these people – they think they are better than everyone else because they do the “right” things. Jesus has news for those people – they are all the same as the “little” people that they look down on every day. Their passion for external perfection has blinded them to the darkness in their hearts.

Those of us that have come to terms with the darkness in our hearts know it’s there and know of the heartache and pain it can cause. Others know about it and revel in it and love the feeling of indulging themselves. To each their own. I’d rather be friends with people who know that they have a dark side and struggle out loud to keep it under control than to sit with anyone who claims that they don’t struggle at all. Jesus was strikingly similar. He couldn’t abide the behavior of the proud and spent most of his time with disciples that did more than struggle – they failed outright all the time.

So, with all that in mind, for anyone to infer that Jesus would approve of his words being used to convict the heart of a child with a broken nose – defenseless and filled with overwhelming shame, fear and pain – is ridiculous.

Jesus felt righteous anger and kicked people around using a whip. The God of the old testament confounds many people because the stories of how vengeful he was don’t seem to line up with the life we are told to live where even FEELING anger or vengeful thoughts is a sin that will send you to hell.

My opinion is simple. God created us in his own image. Jesus was a personification of God. We share some qualities with God, and I believe that feeling the need for revenge is one of them. If that little boy wants the bully dead, I believe we have a God who doesn’t agree, but UNDERSTANDS and in many cases, before we even think to reconcile with him, has come to terms with that anger.

So this morning as it was nearly ten years ago, I feel the anger, the need for revenge and the desire to inflict pain on another person. I believe that God sees a nation with vengeful thoughts and satisfaction over the death of another person and he understands. 

Wow, I didn’t expect to wake up to this news – did anyone?

I have had a lot of moments lately where my brain has seemed to shut down in order to try and deal with the rapid change going on around me, and this morning felt like that. I was in a daze that actually reminded me of that morning in 2001 when we sat watching television and tried to come to terms with the tragedy.

I really really wish that we had been able to capture this man. Dying in a firefight is, in my opinion, not the best way for this man to die. His followers can now see him go out in a blaze of glory, instead of standing trial and standing humiliated in front of the world before hanging by the neck. There is no doubt in my mind about the values of mercy, grace and forgiveness, but this man turned his back on the human race with the acts he perpetrated. He crossed the line 20 years ago where it would have been humanly impossible for anyone to extend these things to him, and God may have struggled with it as well, who knows. Punishment for his crimes against our people and the people of the world needed to be long, and I wanted him to feel it, intensely. I don’t think there is a prison or detention facility that would measure up to the standard that I imagined for this guy.

And I hate to admit it, but I would have petitioned the federal government to build a place of pain specifically for this man.

More on the thirst for revenge later.

My Afghani co-workers here are happy about the news. They know that there could be unrest in the city because of it, but for the most part, they seem to think that things will be quiet – mainly because security forces would punish any demonstrators. Several of the workers were appalled at the innocent lives take in 2001 and were glad to see the perpetrator brought down. One of the Filipino kitchen workers couldn’t understand my question when I asked him what he thought about the news. That was a common response. I had to be patient to get anything out of people here. When I asked what they thought when they heard the news, they misunderstand and tell me the whole story without editorializing. After I ask them again, they seemed to understand and several have stated that it is the first good news of 2011 (or 1390, if you are on the Afghan calendar.)

The Taliban and Osama didn’t really get along too well. They had sheltered him, but according to the workers here, Al Qaeda and the Taliban fought each other as much as they collaborated. My co-workers do not think this development will change the Taliban and the “Spring Offensive” in any way.

“Spring Offensive.” It’s such an oxymoron in my view. Yes, it is offensive, but it’s like saying, “Hey, for New Year’s this year, let’s not celebrate an enjoy each other’s company as much as shoot some people.”

READ BELOW THIS FOR A HEAPING HELPING OF ADAM’S OPINION. DISCLAIMER – IF YOU DON’T LIKE MY OPINION, DEAL WITH IT.

In any case something has been going through my mind and I’ve written privately about it, and in as much as I can speak to it, I’m going to. I was reading a review of a book, and the author used an example to describe wickedness in the human heart. He used the words of scripture, of Jesus himself, to remind us that if we have thought about doing things in our minds/hearts, then we are as guilty as if we’d done the acts themselves. Basically, having murderous thoughts makes you a murderer. Jesus said so.

I want justice, which in most cases is going to mean death for Osama. Sure, I can ask for forgiveness from God, but I’m not very excited about a life where I take exception to my religious beliefs when it’s convenient, knowing I can just make up with God later.

The reviewer went on to use an example of a bully who punches a smaller child. The bully has done wrong – that is obvious – but this author indicated that if the victim wishes the bully was dead, it was also the victim who’s done wrong. This, he theorized, is the nature of humanity’s deeply ingrained wickedness.

So when I hunger and thirst for revenge instead of righteousness, I’m condemned right? Even if I want justice, and I know that the justice of the state will mean death, what side of God am I coming down on? There are surely 1000 opinions about this issue, and I’m sure that there are Christians reading this that believe they know the opinion that is true, but let me tell you mine. Stop reading if you don’t care or if you’ll feel compelled to write me an essay in response – I’m not interested – write your own blog.

When Jesus laid down the law about “sinning in your heart,” an audience analysis is very important. The people he was trying to convict were the people who had been thinking that they were perfect. Much like today, there were people that thought that since they didn’t murder people, they weren’t so bad. In fact, they were better than everyone else because of their observance of the law. Jesus calls them to task and lets them know that their thoughts and emotions are as powerful as their actions. You know these people – they think they are better than everyone else because they do the “right” things. Jesus has news for those people – they are all the same as the “little” people that they look down on every day. Their passion for external perfection has blinded them to the darkness in their hearts.

Those of us that have come to terms with the darkness in our hearts know it’s there and know of the heartache and pain it can cause. Others know about it and revel in it and love the feeling of indulging themselves. To each their own. I’d rather be friends with people who know that they have a dark side and struggle out loud to keep it under control than to sit with anyone who claims that they don’t struggle at all. Jesus was strikingly similar. He couldn’t abide the behavior of the proud and spent most of his time with disciples that did more than struggle – they failed outright all the time.

So, with all that in mind, for anyone to infer that Jesus would approve of his words being used to convict the heart of a child with a broken nose – defenseless and filled with overwhelming shame, fear and pain – is ridiculous.

Jesus felt righteous anger and kicked people around using a whip. The God of the old testament confounds many people because the stories of how vengeful he was don’t seem to line up with the life we are told to live where even FEELING anger or vengeful thoughts is a sin that will send you to hell.

My opinion is simple. God created us in his own image. Jesus was a personification of God. We share some qualities with God, and I believe that feeling the need for revenge is one of them. If that little boy wants the bully dead, I believe we have a God who doesn’t agree, but UNDERSTANDS and in many cases, before we even think to reconcile with him, has come to terms with that anger.

So this morning as it was nearly ten years ago, I feel the anger, the need for revenge and the desire to inflict pain on another person. I believe that God sees a nation with vengeful thoughts and satisfaction over the death of another person and he understands.

Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Comments

Let the games begin!

Today, I helped the Afghan workers in our office to learn a valuable lesson in Western culture. I taught them the rules and general strategy for the board game known as “Sorry.”

I also explained why it was named “Sorry” and they were very entertained. Apparently, there is an Afghan equivalent to “Sorry” that they call “Go-No-Go” and it’s played mostly by young children. “Sure it is Ghafoor,” I said, “and why did I see you playing it with your mother?” Somehow the humor of what I said did not come across well. The friendship between Ghafoor and myself is on a time-out.

Happily though, he and Khaliq still took the time to tell me of some of the other board games and parlor entertainments that are popular here. The passion for games that led to the development and furthering of chess, backgammon and parcheesi is still alive in Afghanistan!

Here are some of the favorites, with the names translated to the literal English:

1. “The Chase of Enlightenment Pie” – much like Trivia Pursuit, this game focuses on questions related to Afghani history with much much smaller categories like, “When will we get electricity?” and “How much better my life would be with a sewer system.”

2. “Pomegranates to Pomegranates” – this game allows each person a turn at associating the other players suggestions to his chosen topic. And no, there is no second place! Who cares which card was the runner up? Come on people, don’t be sore losers!

3. “The Words Which Are Forbidden” – much like Taboo, this game is played without the electronic aids, but with the addition of a person walking around the circle with a machete. Women must not speak during this game.

4. “I Give You Good Price” – this is the game styled after the shouted promise of the bazaar salesperson. It’s very similar to Monopoly, but the little guy on the front of the box is wearing a turban, and each time around the board is known as “I am past the Going!” There are cards that read, “Please be going to prison. Do not be past the going and do not collect 9,008 AFE.” And much like the American version, you may roll doubles or pay 2,252 AFE to get out of prison. Or the more popular option – your friends can dig you a tunnel.

5. “The Head” – which is an awkward phrase for us from the US, but for the Afghans, it’s their own version of Cranium. This large-box game comes with an AK-47 that, as part of one of the routine challenges, must be broken down, cleaned and reassembled while the player is blindfolded. And yes, much like in the US, the wonderful-smelling purple molding clay is almost always dried out the next time you try to play.

I’m not saying that Mattel has anything to worry about except copyright infringement, but I have been impressed with how the Afghans really come to play.

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Happy MV Day

It was just 11 years ago, in 1992, that the socialist government that had controlled Afghanistan, was overthrown by the Mujahideen , and an era of influence by the Soviet Union came to an end.

The celebration of the fall if Kabul and the establishment of a non-socialist government is celebrated each year on April 28th.

The Soviets had actually cut and run a few years before ’92, in 1989, but the reason they were there – to fight the spread of Marxist socialist ideals – was solved three years later. The Mujahideen were a pretty ballsy group of rebels, but you and I should all consider them as little brothers of our own freedom, since it was the United States that funded their fight. Charlie Wilson’s war (now a major motion picture starring Tom Hanks and some other guys) is the story of our invovlement in that conflict. It was an escalation of the cold war where we fought the Soviet Union through our proxies, the Mujahideen.

The fact that we spent, by some estimates, up to 40 billion dollars training and outfitting these fighters is interesting. The root word of Mujahideen is jihad – and it means, as most people know, “to struggle.” These fighters were struggling in the 1980′s to win back their country, and since they were struggling against the USSR, we wanted to help them. But now, it seems that they are struggling against us most of the time, and it would take an act of God to pass an act of Congress that would help anyone who labeled their campaign as anything that even rhymed with “jihad.”

The holiday was celebrated this last Tuesday and Wednesday, blending right into the Thursday weekend day. Due to security concerns in Kabul, there wasn’t much celebrating going on in the streets. The weekend, according to our Afghan workers, was spent relaxing and in one case, attending an engagement party.

Afghanistan has few holidays that are not Islamic, and most are recently adopted. But strangely enough, they are very similar to ours. We celebrate our independance from England on July 4th, Afghans celebrate their own independance from England on August 19th. We celebrate Mother’s Day on May 15th, they celebrate International Women’s Day on March 8th. We celebrate Veteran’s Day while they have Remebrance Day for Martyrs and Disabled . . . day. We celebrate Labor Day and they celebrate the similar-sounding, but completely different, Labour Day. We celebrate Father’s Day in June, and they celebrate men all the time by making sure that everyone knows that men are much better and stronger than every other sex.

I actually asked the guys if there is anything they say to each other on MV Day, like “Happy Freedom Day!” at which they laughed and said that it is a relatively boring holiday, but they did say to each other “Happy Day that We Don’t Have to Work!”

So I say to you, Happy Mujahideen Victory Day! Or you may prefer the shortened version: Most Felicitations to You on this Most Auspicious Anniversary of the Momentous Day when the Socialist Dogs of Kabul were Brought Low by the Mujahideen Victors . . . day.

Posted in Uncategorized | Comments Off

Stuff that isn’t the same

Here are all the differences between what I’m used to in the United States and what they have here in Kabul. I mean all the common, everyday things that have taken some time to get used to since I’ve been here.

Okay, so it’s not all the things, but it’s the little things that don’t make you write home – just include in a blog on a slow blog-day.

So here we go.

The power goes out every 60 minutes or so, but only for a few seconds each time. We all have to have voltage regulators that will keep our computers going until the power comes up again.

Air conditioning units have a the cooling mechanism just about where you’d see it in the US – right at the base or right under the window on the outside of the house, but the fan for the unit is at the top of the window, on the inside of the building. This unit is controlled by a remote, and it makes little dinging noises when you operate said remote. This is the way that almost all homes are air conditioned and heated.

Toilets have a normal sized bowl, but only water in the teeny tiny little bottom part of the bowl.

Toilet paper has a huge cardboard roll in the middle, so the amount of actual paper is much much less. That’s pretty blatant, right? I mean, it’s not like we aren’t going to notice that the cardboard roll on the inside looks as big around as a can of soda! Come on toilet paper people. We may have to go real bad, but we aren’t stupid.

(There’s at least one more that has to do with the bathroom. I’m just warning.)

Speaking of soda cans, all of them have pull tabs. Yep, that’s right. For all of you that had started a wicked necklace or belt in 1982, but were never able to finish it, I can send you a whole bunch of pull tabs because I go through two or three cans of Fanta and El Famir Coke each day.

The flush handle for the toilet is on the top of the tank. I’ve seen similar mechanisms, but not exactly like these – a flat panel that sits flush with the top of the tank, but press down on the side closest to the edge, and the whole thing pivots like a stone panel from an Indiana Jones movie, and the flush is done before you can say, “Look out Docta Jones!”

Lastly, since this is all I can think of right now, there is one thing that constantly catches me off guard and invariably makes me look like an idiot as I’m coming and going from the buildings on the camp.

The doorknobs all the turn the opposite way.

You’ve got to turn the doorknob clockwise to get the door to open. That’s just wrong. I mean, it feels right-er to turn it away from the latch, unlatching (or “knobbing” as the pros say) the door. I used to ask myself, “Is it because I’m on the other side of the planet?” I didn’t think it was because of that, a hunch that was later confirmed by Wikipedia. It seems that the knobs turn that way just because things are different here. It’s been fun so far to learn these new things, but it’s also helped me to understand a little bit more of just how backwards a country could become when it can’t figure out how to make a doorknob that turns the right way. I’m just saying.

Posted in Uncategorized | Comments Off

It’s about a prison break – you’ll like it . . .

I was talking with some of the locals a few days ago, and they were telling me this incredible story. I thought I’d relate it here.

It was a really moving story about an Afghani named Anhahandy who was working in Kandahar as a prosperous businessman. He was successful, young and newly-married. His young wife was beautiful and together they were a nice looking couple. But you could tell that Ahnahandy was not a very warm person. He was strong, but very quiet – very reserved.

So it wasn’t incredibly surprising when it was discovered that Anhahandy’s wife was involved in an adulterous relationship with a flambouyant local cricket player. It was Anhahandy’s right, according to Afghani and Islamic law, to have her stoned to death for her indiscretions, but before a formal complaint could be lodged with the local police, she was found dead, and close by was the body of the lecherous cricket player.

While the magistrate knew that Anhahandy’s wife was guilty and would have been publically executed by legal decree, he wasn’t very happy that Anhahandy had gone ahead and taken the intiative to see justice done. The judge was also a little angry that the cricket player was dead because the upcoming match with Kabul United now looked like it would be a total loss. And he had money on that match.

Over the next two weeks, Anhahandy was put on trial and convicted for the murder of his wife and, more importantly, the cricket player (it turns out that many of the jurors had money on that match as well.) Anahandy was sent to prison in Kandahar for two life sentences, one for each of his victims.

It was in prison that Anhahandy met Rhedalim, another inmate who was also serving a life term. His infrequent parole hearings always resulted in a rejection. One reason was because parole was normally granted to those prisoners who could pay the parole board enough money to let them go. Rhedalim had no money and no influential friends to help him get out of prison. So he had started a cottage industry of getting forbidden goods into the prison. It was a tough business because most of what he could get was bootleg DVD’s, and the surprising lack of both DVD players and . . . electricity in the prison, turned his best bit of business into very shiny decorations for the prisoner’s cells.

But I digress.

Anhahandy and Rhedalim became close friends, and even the hardest criminals in the prison didn’t think that the two were gay, but just two normal guys who were best friends. While they did not casually abbrreviate “best friends” to BF’s for several prison-related reasons, they did just call the two “buddies.”

The best part of the story is when Anhahandy was pushed too far by the suffering in the prison. He started acting strangely and Rhedalim was very worried that his buddy would kill himself, or worse, would kill others. And those worries were compounded by the news that Azim, a new prisoner, had confessed to the brutal crime that Anhahandy had already spent years in prison paying for! Surely Allah had a plan, but Rhedalim could not see it.

The next morning, to everyone’s surprise, Anhahandy was not in his cell! His prayer rug that sported a large picture of Muhammed, was covering a hole in the floor that marked the entrance to the longest tunnel that had ever been dug in the long history of prison breaks in Kandahar. Also, despite the vigilance of the Afghan National Police guards, 500 of Anhahandy’s closest friends also escaped through the tunnel. It turned out that bootleg DVD’s were perfect digging tools. Rhedalim felt proud for the first time in his life.

That new pride led Rhedalim to first, forgive Anhahandy for not simply knocking on his cell door while escaping with 500 other inmates, and second, to finally sell something worth some money, namely marijuana, to the remaining 15 inmates, and save the money to get himself paroled. Following the clues of his friend, he travelled south, to the Iranian border, and started the long trek to the Persian Gulf, where he hoped to find Anhahandy.

And that is the story of The Kandahar Redemption.

I was moved.

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Bazaar Day – A Good Day to Shop/Die

The training course we went through when we got to Camp Gibson was very interesting, because it had lessons in Afghanistan history, counter-surveillance, roadside bomb construction, and convoy security. You guys in the military know all this stuff, but the six people in the training course were all non-military, life and mission support staff. That’s what they call us anyway.

So when one of our little group gets ready to head outside the walls to go into the city, we all get a little nervous, because the course that was the most affecting was the “Combat Mindset” course. This one is where you learn of the color code system that describes how alert you are to your surroundings. White, Yellow, Orange and Red are the colors, describing an escalation of awareness from completely oblivious to your surroundings to killing someone to defend yourself.

Our training was done on a Saturday and Sunday, and it was on Sunday that we were talking about this mindset. The key example that many of the instructors, including this one, used was the fact that Sunday is Bazaar day on camp. We let 20-40 Afghans onto the base to sell carpets, dvds, sunglasses, knives and jewelry. So if there is going to be an attack, there is a good possibility that it is going to happen on Sunday.

So first off, imagine spending your Sunday like that anyway – waking up at 5 a.m. to go to work for 10 hours, then heading to church at 7 p.m. In the middle, you visit the bazaar, looking to haggle some locals down to almost nothing for junk that you probably won’t use for more than a week. It’s an interesting Sunday schedule.

But the key to Sunday is in the combat mindset. You know that there’s going to be possible danger from the locals coming to the camp. They are searched coming through the gate, but unless you are doing the search yourself, do you really trust that? I don’t. So you transition from White, the state of mind you are in when you are sleeping, or talking on your cell phone – not really aware of what is going on around you – to Yellow, where you are vigilant about observing your surroundings, checking behind you at all times, and making plans. You make plans about what you will do in certain situations. At this level, you start telling yourself – getting in the mindset – that you may have to kill somebody. You start to face that possibility in your brain, so that if it comes to it, you’ll go through with the steps you need to take if you or your buddies are threatened.

See, I didn’t want to know all this! I just wanted a couple of dvd’s! It’s like getting yourself into the mindset that when you go to wal-mart to buy some cheetos, that you may have to kneecap someone if they get in your way. Now, granted, I’m okay with it if they have a screaming baby, but otherwise, it’s not a good way to be thinking on a daily basis.

In the end, as you head to bed on Saturday night, I’m going to work on Sunday morning, preparing myself to: 1. Get a screaming deal on a switchblade. 2. Shoot the guy who’s selling it to me.

Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments

The Average Day

Camp Gibson is in the north part of Kabul, right up against a rocky hillside, and like most camps designed by DynCorp, it is roughly 200mx200m. I find it interesting that my 40,000sq meters is all that I get for the next year. My trips to the airport, four of them plus the trip home at the end of the year, will be my only opportunities to leave the compound.

So I guess the question is whether or not I’m going to go absolutely street-rat crazy. So far, this is what my days are like (and it’s seven of them in a row before I start another set of seven. . . .)

When I first arrived here, the time differences, plus the altitude, made it really hard to sleep. I slept about 4 hours each night and spent a lot of time watching movies and reading books I had brought with me. I’ve settled down to a more normal sleep pattern, but I’m in bed by 9:30 or 10 p.m., about lunch time in Boise.

I used that crazy jet lag time to set up a normal wake up routine at 5 a.m. It is 6:30 p.m. in Boise and let’s me get some good Skype time with family and most days, with Layne. It also gives me a good 90 minutes before I have to even think about getting ready for work.

I live 30 meters from my desk. I’m at the east end of building 18, and right across the main “street” of the camp, is the finance building, where my desk sits in the east end. So it takes less than 30 seconds to walk back to my bunk, and I get to stop in at my computer several times during the day to see what’s happening on Facebook or whatever. It’s very nice. Plus, the bathroom in my building always seems to have a distinct odor about it, and it takes almost as little time to use my own. I’m never far from my home base. This is good news.

Directly north of my office building is the DFAC, and it opens at 6 a.m., so I normally wander in there by 6:45 or so and eat the breakfast of champions. Out the south door, I’m 20 steps from my office and 20 more to my desk. I’m normally there about 7:15 or so.

11:30 is when I break for lunch and normally just get a snack. Sometimes, I run at 11 and get some lunch after that, getting back to work at 12:30 – when the office actually opens up again.

Another 5 hours later and most of the staff leaves for dinner at 5:30. I normally take this time to run a few miles, then hit the chow hall at 6:00. There are about two nights out of the week that we have conference calls with our headquarters in Fort Worth, TX. They are 9.5 hours behind us, so at about 6:30 -8:30, we either keep working or come back in to talk to the big bosses.

It’s definitely a longer schedule than I’m used to, and in my first two weeks, I put in about 65 hours in each of them. The good news is that I’m salaried! Wait, that’s not good news. Screw it.

So I get home by 7:30 or so each night, a little earlier sometimes and I get to talk to Layne over Skype before she heads to work. It’s at this point that since I’m 10.5 hours in the future that I tell her what’s going to happen during her day. Don’t believe me? Just try to surprise her. You won’t be able to.

A few movies, some reading or mandolin scales and I’m ready for bed. I hear that there are a bunch of people that play in some little poker tournaments, nothing major, but I probably will try to get in on those eventually. I enjoy losing money in a foreign land.

There are a couple of rec facilities, and I fully anticipate becoming the ping pong champion of the Kabul Northern Region, but I’m working my way into it.

I think, in the end, that a year won’t be long enough to make me stir crazy. It’s a small little place, but I think that I’ll find ways to stay busy.

Posted in Uncategorized | Comments Off

The dates are all relative

In AD 615 according to the Gregorian Calendar, Muhammad, the founder of Islam, was living in Mecca and was being persecuted for his beliefs. In fact, all of his followers were being persecuted by an economic monopoly that feared a mono-theistic belief system. Muhammad told his followers to head west to modern-day Ethiopia to find shelter from persecution. The interesting thing about where he sent them was the leadership of the country. The king there was Christian.

Muhammad sent his followers to a Christian nation to escape persecution.

The same wealthy merchants from Mecca threatened to kill Muhammad, so he left on the 200 mile trip to Medina and the rest of the story forms the foundation for the Islamic faith. But I found this bit of history very interesting.

I was looking into it because I was talking to Khaliq about a business license for one of our vendors, and he told me that the license expired in 1390. I was impressed that we somehow were keeping records from the 1300′s. What I didn’t understand is that the Persian calendar is the standard for datekeeping here in Afghanistan. Dates are recorded a bit differently in Iran because of the changes that have happened in both countries in the last 100 years or so, but when I asked Khaliq what marked the beginning of the calendar 1390 years ago, he didn’t understand my question. It was actually funny because I asked him, “What happened 1390 years ago to mark year zero?” He laughed and responded, “I wasn’t there!”

I learned that it was Muhammad’s journey to Medina that marked the first year of the Persian calendar in approximately 622 AD. But besides that, the Persian Calendar is nearly the exact same length as the Gregorian calendar that we use in the US. They are both solar calendars, so unlike those crazy Babylonians who went with the lunar calendar, there are 365 days plus a smidge that’s taken care of every four or five years in a leap year. Stupid Babylonians couldn’t get on board with that?!

The good news is that since the Persian calendar marks the new year with the beginning of Spring on the vernal equinox (which is how the Christian calendar marks what holiday?) this next year, I’ll get a new year’s party on Dec 31st and on March 20th! Oh yeah! Daddy’s going to party like its . . . 1391! (I’m Daddy in this little story.)

It humbling to think about the fact that even in this modern day, we are all still marking time (on both sides of the planet) according to the lives of ancient religious figures. And the most revered figure of the religion that many Christians believe is the enemy, sent his followers to Christians for sanctuary. Would he do the same today? Will we be a sanctuary for people with different beliefs? I hope so.

Posted in Uncategorized | Comments Off